all vows annulled

i started  a post that was meant to be super reflective and thoughtful. but i found i just couldnt get anywhere. these high holidays have been probably some of, if not the most, meaningful yet. i think this past year might have been too. i just find myself taking things in with more thought and consideration. and even simply just knowing more about who i am and my surroundings. i am figuring out what it means when people say they know themselves and what they want. it makes it much easier to approach things with more sincerity and compassion. i hope that this next year is filled with blessings, friendship, love, kindness, and thoughtfulness. i want this year to be filled with completed goals, and aims met. to be who i can so that i can do all i can.

no mass apologies.and lets be real. its insincere.
gmar chatima tova!

The ReReturn

11 months later and here I am.
Post PC
Post COS Travels.

some plans in the work. I will update later. I will be a better blogger. I will. I will. I will.

summer summary

summer came and went this year, in fact sept is pretty much over. please dont take my absence of posts as abandonment, take it as me living up my last summer in ukraine!

JUNE


as soon as school ended i packed a bag and headed to lugansk ( far east, read: russia) a good friend of mine lives there and we never get to see each other because we are so far so i took the opportunity to help her with her camp and see the east. even though i technically live in central ukraine it still took about 24 hours (2 buses and 2 trains) to get to her. 

The east is a crazy place. its really quite strange to hear and see all the signs in russian. the language issue is a big deal here and coming from somewhere where most people are pro ukrainian, it gives you a whole new perspective.


after Kristin's camp i headed to kyiv to meet up with 5 lovely ladies to head to Croatia (via budapest)!!!! we trained the whole way. so round trip thats a total of 10 trains and 2 ferries for a total travel time of about.... 70 hours. whoa.

budapest: since most of us had been to budapest before we took advantage of the awesome city and pretty much just ate delicious food: thai food. mexican food. cantaloupe. CHEETOS! amazing.

after 2 nights in budapest we headed to croatia. croatia is beautiful. beautiful nature, beautiful people, beautiful food. beautiful.  we saw the capital, zagreb, split, and the island hvar. pretty much croatia consisted of beach time, food time, and sunshine. perfect.
                          people complain about the trains in ukraine but they actually have beds to sleep on. on our over night train in croatia it was 5 grown ladies, in a 6 person sitting compartment. it was pretty miserable. someone even slept on the floor. i will never say anything negative about ukrainian trains again. not even when its 100+ degrees, no one will open a window, and you are surrounded by drunk smelly people. NEVER.

sangria in a fish bowl!

in split we rented an apartment. it had tv, internet, ac, hot water, and best of all washing machine and dryer! i got to wash my clothes (not by hand!!!) for the first time in 14 months. that could have possibly been the highlight of the trip.....

                                               

the last week in june was the first ( hopefully to be annual) vinnytska oblast camp. we held it in tyvriv at Caitlyn's site and it was a huge success. we had campers from all over our oblast and awesome counselors. we had different themed days and most importantly the kids loved it. 

JULY

MARIA!!! my first visitor!!! for 2 weeks in july i got to show off my lovely ukraine. our route: kyiv, lviv, my site, crimea, kyiv. i tried to show her a little bit of everything to get a taste of real ukraine and i think i did it. from homemade borsch, to the black sea, to a ukraine summer camp. it was great and she handled all of the quirks that make ukraine, ukraine quite nicely :)

dont say everything you know, but know everything you say.
mighty fine soviet wisdom.

                                             

        After Maria left I headed to the west for the first of 2 Camp Unitys . This camp is part of the multicultural awareness council here in ukraine ( PCV run). this camp was all about, as im sure you can guess, multiculturalism!!  the camp was great. super interesting lessons, awesome guests, and beautiful surroundings! 

we made pinatassssss!

one of the major successes of the west camp was getting the kids to stand in a straight line while waiting for their food!! patience and lines are not so big here so trust when i say it was a success and worth a picture!

AUGUST

In the beginning of August i did the second Camp Unity in the east. this camp, as its west counterpart, was a great success. we were lucky enough to have some special guests. Ukraine actually has a good amount of refugees and we invited 2 teenagers to come and be campers at our camp. it was great for the ukrainian campers and i think great for them too. outside of big cities here you dont see much diversity so it was a good opportunity for the kids to meet kids their own age of different backgrounds.

I went to my region center for Ukrainian Independence Day. One of the volunteer's org wanted to celebrate American style. So she had them play kickball and have a hot dog eating contest!! you might not be able to tell from the picture but those hot dogs and buns were HUGE. they were also covered in ketchup and mayo.

When I got back to site I went straight to a camp my counterpart was working at. a true ukrainian "rest" summer camp. she tried to have as much english there as possible and we played american games and taught them how to much friendship bracelets. spreading the fb loveeeeeeeeee. 

                                         one last trip to the river and that ends out my summer.

in pictures

school is done, my grants are submitted and here i am with 3 days with a short to do list before i start my summer adventures. ive been lacking pictures lately so here are some from the last few months. 

THINGS I SAW WITH MY EYES. 

 in the beginning of may i went on this amazing jewish tour of bratslav. i knew there was a rich history but it blew my mind. this is part of the old jewish cemetery. 

 my lovely easter paska (easter bread) clearly my love for icing and sprinkles couldnt wait til after i took a picture.

 the lovely spread for our passover seder

happy bday kristin! cake from a box and icing from a can! delicious! oh and a shot of whiskey. pretty much america. 

 we had a miss school pageant. with 3 contestants. and 1 of their tasks was sewing a button...

a view from my friend cait's site. 

 11th form graduation. they dance with their parents/teachers. 

the beautiful park in uman 

 i got my kids to do an art exchange with kids from all over the world. we sent in 25 pieces about ukraine and then we will receive 25 pieces from kids all over the world! i just got our art. and i appreciate the thank you on the envelope :)

 most of my lovely ladies from the 5th form

 the 2nd form at the orphanage........i think about 24 students....

 .... compared to the 2nd form at school #2. ...  

 last bell! the lovely 4th formers... moving up to the big time!

 the 9th formers at last bell. you can leave school after 9th or 11th form

 this is puppy dog ( he doesnt speak english dont worry about it) hes my landlady's dog. he might be the sweetest pup ever. he walks me to school, the bus stop, and the shop. he even gives me hugs. 

home sweet home

some lovely flowers i got from students at last bell

and probably the cutest 3 year old ive ever met. a student's little sister. she even calls me ms. elyse. and she gives me her cherry pits. 

may 9th is victory day. the day the soviets beat the nazis. our very own bratslavian veteran!

 my 7th form boys!

 my first time fishing! some of those fishies in there are mine!! 

right after i posted about march and april i knew i left something out. but i couldnt put my finger on it. it bothered me for a second. then it came to me a few days later. march marked my 1 year anniversary in ukraine. i couldnt believe that i forget that. it did and still does seem like such a landmark. since being here i feel like i have a lot more landmarks/milestones/time markers then before. Every month is an x month anniversary, every week feels like more than just a week. i have activities scheduled months in advance, just because thats how it has to be done. people are busy, start booking. there is always something to look forward to, something to get through...


so a year. where to start. ive thought about it, this, many times. since my language skills dont allow it, most of my deeper conversations are had with myself. and ive thought, and thought what does it mean, how do i feel, what have i done, whats next. and i do really want to put it to paper, or whatever this is but now im finding it rather difficult...


what i do know, is that its not all about me. why im here, what i am doing this for. sure a little is. i dont think its very truthful for anyone to say its not but it wasnt my main reason. i really just want to be able to walk away when its over and feel like ive done the best i could do and maybe that i did something that was of value for them. after one year i dont feel that i have done as much as i could, but i think its good that i know i havent succeeded yet, this time, right now failure isnt really failing. though with time on the clock thats easy to say. i guess the biggest conclusion i can make is that after one year im not ready to leave yet.


a year ago i couldnt even imagine myself now. and i cant even begin to imagine myself a year from now. 

for zboat

giant and radioactive.

March & April

Spring is here! but really spring here means a lot of rain and still the occassional snow. but more and more everyday i see green popping up and that atleast, makes me happy, even if i still have to wear multiple layers.

much has happened in these past 2 months, so lets see what i can remember.....

MARCH

• the 8th of March is international women's day. which is celebrated in pretty much every country except for the USA. mmmmhmmmmm. yea. we got days off from school, students bring you presents, you eat a lot of cake. might just be the best holiday ever. to celebrate this marvelous day i ventured to a neighboring PCV's site where the 5 of us lovely ladies celebrated our womanhood ( read: booze, food, and science experiments)
• I tried to stay low key for most of march because spring break i went to istanbul!!! i went with 2 other PCV's (Kimberley and Kristin) and we met up with some more there. Istanbul is a beautiful city with so much culture! beautiful mosques everywhere, delicious food, friendly people. We ventured to the asian side of the city and found this great bazaar and even did a turkish bath. pretty much a turkish bath involves many half naked people, hot stone tables, and shampoo. ill leave it at that.
• and of course i had my usual routine of teaching and clubs. 

APRIL (first half-ish anyways)

• April started off great with Emma! my first niece was born! yay! 
• Pesach:
• i was invited to go to kyiv to celebrate Passover with friends of some PCV friends i have. we celebrated the first 2 nights with 2 completely different seders. one was super orthodox and strict the next was super ukrainian and liberal. both were equally enjoyable!
• after the seders i got to go back to my friends super tiny village ( 650 people!) and experience his village. the highlight: milking a goat! or at least attempting too. its not as easy as it looks. 
• last week was ukrainian easter ( they are orthodox and run on a different calendar). i experienced this last year and this year was pretty similar. i woke up at 3 am to go to church with my counterpart and her family. after standing in the rain and getting blessed by the priest we went back to their house and had breakfast. but its not really breakfast when you are drinking wine and eating all kinds of meats and veggies right? then i came home and slept for hours only to wake up and feast some more with my host baba and her family. 
• ive also discovered the "sercret" jewish population of my town! im pretty excited. and when i say "secret" i mean it was a secret to me because i didnt know they existed before now. oh and one of the woman of the group ( yea theres a group) reassured me that there are some young unmarried nice men in this group. so i guess our fears of me returning old and alone are no longer!! 

this weekend we are holding a seder for volunteers in kyiv and im pretty excited. hopefully it turns out well, especially since we are cooking all the food ourselves. but dont fear, ive already volunteered to only boil the eggs. i think we are safe. 

Brocclichka!

finally, my littlest broccoli has entered the world. i couldnt be happier! actually if i was there i couldnt be happier. everyday there is a moment or two when i miss home. you know something reminds you of a person, or a specific memory. but usually it passes. now that shes here and so far away i miss home everyday and it lasts longer than a moment. luckily i live in the time of internet and can see pictures of her whenever i want. 

brocclichka, i love you more than words. <3

peace corps.

what did you think i do?

cont....

January!

in the month of january i think taught classes for a total of.......8 days. 

school was canceled the last week of jan due to the freezing temps. i cant say i minded not having to walk to school with the fear of losing my limbs to frostbite. 

besides that january also was the month of language refresher. pretty much it was a week camp for the volunteers to come and practice/work on their russian/ukrainian skills. or... be reminded that you have no language skills ( as in my case). though it was really nice to be the student instead of the teachers and i have to say the pc peeps put in a lot of work and it was a good time! not to mention that the facility had hot showers and free internet! also a week of free food... yes please!

also in jan is my bday. it happens like that every year it seems...

after language refresher a lot of the volunteers went to kyiv for the weekend. the original plan was for ballet and bagels with my friend who's bday is the day after mine. but.. after going out the night before it didnt really happen so we just settled for bagels. and that was just fine. BAGELS!!! we also went to a great falafel place that was discovered by another volunteer. the owner in fact speaks no ukrainian or russian and perfect english. he even claims to have lived in laguna hills! what!!!! yea it might just be my new favorite place. that and the bagels of course....

feb!

feb has also gone by really fast and that might be in part because i havent taught that much this month either! the first week myself, my counterpart and one my students went to a pepfar (presidents emergency plan for aids relief) conference. on a more serious note HIV is a huge problem in ukraine. it has the highest infection rate in europe. i would have said before that i knew a lot of hiv/aids but now i really feel confident in my ability to talk to others about it and educate and spread actual factual information. i can also talk about it in ukrainian now! hopefully my school and i will be starting a project in this field soon. 

since then i went to a sauna with some friends and gotten sick :( the temperature is rising and im hoping that soon it will be constantly above freezing and i wont need to wear 4 layers of tights and leggings and socks to go outside!  i cant wait for spring and sunshine and fruits and veggies! 

oh and im at 11 months! 

and now you have been...

UPDATED!

pow. 

oh hey 2012. 

there you are. 

its been 2ish months since i posted anything so heres a sum up of the happenings and hopefully the beginning of more frequent posts ( ill say it until it becomes a reality)

trips

BUDAPEST

budapest is an amazing city that i highly recommend to everyone! being that it was the first place we had ventured to while being here, we of course tried to soak all things hungarian and of course anything else we could find that is not available in ukraine. this led to .... many many bags of cheetos, subway ( as in sandwiches!) thai food, and spices! our many budapest(ian) adventures including: walking tour, the baths, underground(literally) club, a romanian band, ruin pubs, locals, london teenagers, and sandwiches! 

SERBIA and ROMANIA

the trip i took over winter was pretty awesome. first we flew to belgrade, serbia on the tiniest baby planes ever invented. if you know me and my "love" for flying then you can just imagine how fast my heart was racing and how much i must have sweat. but its winter so.. i considered it like exercise.... 

belgrade is an awesome city. i also highly recommend it! its alittle harder to get to but it hasnt become a tourist trap that other big western european cities. the people were great, the food was pretty good ( not for vegetarians though....) and we met some cool people in our hostel. there are still bombed out buildings from the war and hearing stories about it from our walking tour guide was unreal. 

we took the train from belgrade to romania and got stuck at the border for 3 hours! they ripped apart our train in search of cigarettes and alcohol. and they ended up finding like 1000 cartons. cigarettes are super cheap in serbia and romania is an eu country ( or becoming im not entirely sure where they are in the process) so cigarettes are much more expensive. needless to say smuggling is huge!

once we actually got into the country we we visited 4 cities. Romania is a beautiful country for sure! we went to dracula's castle (ooooooooooooooooh) and saw the narrowest ( or one of) streets in europe (highlight of the trip!) on our way back to ukraine we missed the one bus that goes between the 2 countries and had to hitchhike back. 

after that we headed to l'viv. there we met up with a few other volunteers, had some doughnut for ukrainian christmas then headed home!

and of course on my 8 hour train ride i got to share my wagon with a school field trip. 30 something 11 year olds running around on a train. gloriousssssssssss. 

potatoes!

In September my school gave me about 50 kilos of potatoes. 50 kilos... 100lbs? i think... anyways its alot. Now winter has hit and veggies and fruits here are at a minimum. That combined with my extreme laziness and i think you can guess what i eat for dinner every night!

You know the scene in Forest Gump when Buba is talking about all the things you can do with shrimp? Ive always thought that potatoes are the shrimp of the veggie world, yet i still find myself only eating maybe 3 variations of potatoes. 1. mashed. 2. roasted 3. boiled.

Why am i devoting so much space to potatoes? some deep, thoughtful metaphor, right? that maybe just maybe potatoes represent more than just what i eat for dinner every night. That potatoes represent Ukraine and why ive come here and what im doing, and overcoming?

......... no. i just eat a lot of potatoes.

As promised here is a pic. We made these for thanksgiving at Caitlyn's. Can you guess which one is mine?

This weekend i "rearranged" some furniture in my room and i feel revitalized! 

i dont know what happened to november. it was here and gone before i realized it. I have a post written about Budapest but ill wait til i can upload it with pics and then there is thanksgiving too! 

ive discovered a favorite ukrainian candy and also that i have the ability to skype! pretty good things for the cold dark winter nights that have descended. 

the semester is over in less than 3 weeks and that seems crazy to me. im approaching my 9th month in Ukraine and i feel like i just got here. The next group of volunteers get to site in a few weeks and i will no longer be a newbie. I will be expected to actually know how things work here...though i dont think that will ever happen. 

i think every time i post something i say something to the effect that ill try and be better about posting. but... i dont really think that will happen.  

so heres to potatoes, positive attitudes, and 2012! 

im not doing so well at this updating thing.
here is my new and improved vow make updating this a regular event!
here here!

so since school has started i have actually been busy! go figure! the summer me would have never thought the day would come where i would actually have things to do!!

my school bus

my school schedule is set and i am teaching 18 hours a week. it doesnt sound like a lot but when you add prep time it for sure adds up. and technically i am suppose to have 3 hours a club a week and i havent really started that yet. im hoping to at the beginning of nov ( after fall break). I have actually tried to start a teachers english club but no one comes :( its very sad.  for the most part the kids are good. perhaps not totally motivated but overall pretty well behaved. i, of course, have had the occasional cussing, which i dont even think they really know what it means, but i am trying to nip that in the bud. the kids, i think, are warming up to me. they see me around school and they stop and say hi, or good morning, even if its 2 in the afternoon.

i told them to work in groups...hmm.....

also last week i did my first project. oct 16 is world food day so with the help of my lovely vanessa i signed my school up for hike4hunger! (hike4hunger.org) pretty much you raise the awareness of world hunger through all different activities and of course, with a hike! We had a lesson all about the causes and effects of hunger, who and where are most affected, how everyone can make a difference! Ukraine actually has a history with famine so the kids know all about that. the hike organizers sent us a banner, these cool necklaces, and a disposable camera ( which i dont think my counterpart had even seen before!). after the lesson we had our hike which was to a park in a neighboring village. we even caught the eye of some locals who offered us money for our cause. i thought it was a nice gesture :) all and all i think it was a good first project, with this hike we are also in the running to win some money from the company who sponsors the event. that would be amazing and my school would definitely put that money to good use!


oh and ive also started a pen pal project with a friend/pcv in Peru! im really excited to have my kids make new friends in new places! i think it will be awesome :)

my weekends have been busy too.

i went to kyiv the last weekend in sept for a working group meeting. its like a focus group/club for volunteers that deal with important subjects in Ukraine and for our projects. since people come from all over the country and that can take hours and hours some volunteers rent apartments for the weekend. so i stayed in one with about 18 other volunteers. let me recap for you one of the most interesting events of the weekend:

3 am on sunday morning. the apartment is quiet, filled with sleeping volunteers. suddenly there are loud crashes and bangs. then silence. then what sounds like water.
" what are you doing?"
"dont worry about it go back to sleep"
"no what the fuck are you doing? you are peeing on the floor!"
" dont worry about it, its been decided. there is a meeting"
"WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING? YOU JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR!"
"its ok its ok go back to sleep"

so that happened. somehow it got cleaned up with minimal yelling. and you thought pc volunteers were classy?

the next weekend was jewish new year and some fellow volunteers planned an amazing event in Dnepropetrovsk. its a huge city about 12 hours from me so i hopped on the train fri night and woke up there. there was food, people and a nice walk to the river to boot! i was told that there was boba in this city, and i would be lying if that wasnt a main reason for me going, you know besides all the jewish stuff and whatnot. so we find the stand and just when we head over there they are out of the bubbles. it was rough. i was heartbroken. but really it was nothing a few shot of vodka couldnt fix. to top off the night we went bowling and im going to brag or anything but if anyone of you out there has seen me bowl than you know what i bring to the table and lets just say i brought it.


the next weekend a fellow volunteer in my oblast had arranged a 527 project. in ukraine the problem of human trafficking is pretty big. people get trafficked many different ways and many of them are preventable. there is a free number here (527) and people can call it when they are applying for jobs abroad, study abroad, or pretty much anything else that might take a person out of the country. they can check to make sure the company is legit and safe. so we had the seminar and then we hit the streets to educate the people!! after that was done i stayed in the city for the night with some friends and got the see the biggest fountain in europe! holla! it has lights and music and even a lazer or two. jealous?

last weekend i stayed home and did nothing. which was fabulous. i got to sleep and read and watch movies. its getting really cold ( in the 30's) so ive plugged in my heater and put on the layers.

next week is fall break and i have a week off! yay!!! myself and 3 other volunteers are heading to budapest! i am so excited! 1. i get to travel on trains with people! i have thus far only traveled solo. 2. i get to leave the country!! 3. i am staying in a hostel so i get to take actual showers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 4. and you know i get to see budapest which im sure is lovely.

notice one of the main ingredients. appetizing no?

so thats about everything. oh to prepare me for the winter my school decided to give me some potatoes. and by some i mean.....50 kilos. yea. i will never have to buy potatoes ever. in fact if you need any potatoes let me know.